Nov 26, 2014
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Bend Ova (Laughing): RDX x Omar The Comedian

Words by Eddie STATS Houghton (via Federation)


Our cohorts over at Federation just posted this hilarious clip of Omar Thompson AKA Omar the Comedian incorporating the inna inna inna inna segment of RDX’s hit “Bend Over” into his routine–in several different ways–at Caroline’s comedy club, followed by a quick impression of a Passa Passa DVD. We could milk this for secondary jokes all day. And we will–offline. For now, just watch it, cause like R Kelly, you bout to double up!

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Don’t Touch: RepJA Unveils “Touch Ah Button” Buttons

Words and photo by Eddie STATS Houghton


We got a special delivery of our own here at the new-brand LargeUp offices last week. Going the “Whey You Get Dem From” tee one better, yard clothiers (bumbaclothiers?) RepJA have established another milestone in the ongoing race to transform Vybz Kartel catchphrases into wearable gold. Oh yes, they did. In homage to the Kartel street anthem “Touch A Button” they have recently unveiled the ‘Touch Ah Button” button.  Of course, if you are not in the mood to hum “touch ah button, nuh” you can go for the everything-bless melody of Wayne Marshall’s “Care Less” instead. Now if Seen, Base Kingston or some other streetwear brand would only come back with a Cobra version that says Mi press trigger / mi nah press people button…we could have a proper campaign-button clash on our hands.

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Call Me Shams: Slap-Chop and Sham-Wow, Flatbush Style

Words by Eddie STATS Houghton and Jason “J-Rockaz” Orford, photo via The Smoking Gun


Quite possibly you have seen the Sham-Wow or Slap-Chop promo spots starring motormouth pitchman Vince Schlomi–pictured above after his arrest for battering a hooker in a South Beach hotel room for almost biting his tongue off (in his defense, he does earn a living off his tongue)–which in 2010 replaced Snuggies as the unintentional infomercial comedy of the moment. If you happen to follow a friend of West Indian descent on twitter you may have even seen one of the homemade youTubes “translating” the rapidfire sales patter into rapidfire sales patois. But unless you live in Brooklyn you have probably not realized that this is a phenomenon that cuts across the entire Caribbean basin, encompassing Jamaica, Trinidad, Guyana and Haiti THAT WE KNOW OF. Therefore we decided to rectify an oversight on the part of the internet and collect these mini-masterpieces of transcultural hilarity all in one place for easy comparison and cross-reference. So without further ado let the Pan-Caribbean Slap-Chop olympics begin (but watch out, the Jamaican have a rasclot secret weapon!)

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Warm Up: Classic West Indian Comic Relief

Words by Jason “J-Rockaz” Orford


Laughter warms the heart–or at the very least distracts from the beating Old Man Winter has been handing out. Which means its a good time to youtube the Emmy-winning 90s variety show, In Living Color. Ah, the 90s. But I’ll bet my bottom dollar that most ILC fans didn’t realize that at the same time in comedic history, folks across the Atlantic, the British were simultaneously ROLF/LMAO/skinning their teeth just as hard in appreciation of their own slapsticking, off the meter prime time comedy show. The BBC’s variety show, the Real McCoy was also a mash up/smash up hit in the UK. Beginning production in 1991, The RMC ran roughly parallel to ILC (which began taping in 1990). The show starred one of my favorites, Felix Dexter–a truly versatile comedian originally from St. Kitts–who anchored the largely West Indian, yet multiracial and equally hilarious cast. The ensemble groups allowed for each comedian to leave an impression.

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Haitian V Makes A Doritos Commercial

Words by Jesse Serwer and J-RockaZ

Central Brooklyn, and Flatbush in particular, is probably the only place in the world where at any given moment you can find people from every Caribbean island— Haitians, Jamaicans, Trinidadians, Vincentians, Bajans, and even Puerto Ricans and Dominicans—all standing on the same block at the same time. It’s an environment that breeds funny situations and people, so it was only a matter of time before an enterprising entertainer represented this culture clash comedically. In his “Haitian V” web skits, sometime stand-up comic Vladimir Barthelemow Thelonious Rasputin Slocumb Calixte the 3rd plays a fish-out-of-water, middle-aged Haitian man (Calixte is in his 20s but based Haitian V on his 40-something uncle) attempting various hustles in New York City. While the fedora-capped V clashes with a colorful cast of characters that includes a subway candy hustler, NBA baller Rajon Rondo and an online predator with the screen name “Mr. Boomshackalack,” his most frequent foil is Ignorant Trevor, his Jamaican arch nemesis. Recently, Calixte played a “Haitian V-like character” in this spec Doritos commercial, submitted to “Crash the Superbowl,” a contest offering Super Bowl airtime and a potential million dollar payday to the amateur commercial with the most votes. Watch the video and vote here, and see below for more of Haitian V in action.

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Charge Up: New Skinny Fabulous Video with Machel Montano

Words by Eddie STATS Houghton

Picture 2

As it was foretold, so it has come to pass. The only thing about this 1000 bpm adrenaline-shot of a video for “Duracell Plus” that does not deliver exactly what was promised by the teaser is this: instead of raving out with a 6-foot tall pink bunny, Skinny Fabulous is kicking that bunny’s ass. Battery included!

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